Wishful Thinking

21 April 2009, 22:00 under Sky Is Falling

Wait for the illusion of the perfect song.

Whining Wishing:

You wish everything’s still fixed and you’re still upstairs in your old unit. You wish for the resumption of having a dsl connection and you wish your just months old electric fan is still properly working after getting dropped. You wish that the bathroom faucet and the goddamn roof’s not leaking like crazy, your place will tidy up by itself and you wish that the rent and the utility bills would just get paid every month automatically. You wish for a refund. You wish for your old work load, when there was less pressure and somebody else bears the brunt for you and your mistakes. You wish for a certain pause button or fast forward or maybe a little rewind. You wish for good health and a steady state of mind. You wish for a little babying and a lot of hugging and you wish to be the kind of person people would like to take care of and nurture and assure for a change not because you’re being spoiled but simply because you deserve a little break and a pat on the back for at least attempting to make it on your own the best you can.

You wish that the lords of independence and responsibility would stop testing you already. You (sometimes) wish to be a four-year-old again. You stupidly wish for a lot of things. But most of all, you wish to feel less alone, that you matter and that all this time, you are well loved.

P.S. Hating the weather. Wala lang. Parang lahat kaya mong gawan ng paraan except yung last.

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